This week we take a look at an example with some strong positives to raise performance and achieve a 7.0, as well as some common mistakes that students too oft make in Hong Kong.
🔖 This essay was produced by a Hong Kong working professional working in one of the hospitals, who is currently targeting a 7.0.
📍 THE IMPORTANCE OF A STRONG FINISH.
Task Achievement solid.
Coherence and cohesion ample.
Grammatical range evident yet with one significant error of a broken down sentence or instance of solecism.
Grammatical accuracy evidences persistent errors such as with passive voice, parsing or parts of speech, awkward prepositions, missing subjects, a very damaging error, and missing determiners or indefinite article, as well as overuse of the definite article, a minor error in terms of the detrimental impact on performance.
One hiccup with a complex sentence essentially derailed the attempt, as well as some collocation and parsing issues.
A strong plus, however, in the conclusion paragraph served to raise performance considerably, as the sample demonstrates as advised, a triple example of at least 3 complex conjunctions, and fortunately, with zero mistakes. If the paper had just a few less errors, this would definitely be a reliable 7.0
Click to read an assay from student & James’ comment :
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